TWIMC: Unslurpable, Nonslurpable, Aslurpable Pt 1 of 2

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I’ve been to the mountain top, I’ve seen the promised land…and I can you tell you this, its condiment station is adequately stocked!

As a consumer rights crusader, I have a keen sense for when “THE MAN” is putting one over on the general public.

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pass go and collect $200 but then pay administrative handling fees of 36%.

 

Corporate malfeasance keeps me up at night, as does heartburn and indigestion.  My years of public service have taught me that we must stamp out injustice ANYWHERE lest it appear EVERYWHERE. Today’s post is a case-in-point.

The following exchange between Big Brown Dad and Edwards Theatre took place a few years ago.  Enjoy!

To Whom It May Concern

I’m writing this letter as a long time patron of the Edward Ontario Mountain Village Theatre. While I have several choices with regards to movie viewing options, I’ve found the staff at Mountain Village most helpful. Regrettably, the staff was unable to help overcome a problem my wife and I encountered this past week when we visited to watch the bromantic comedy, I Love You, Man.

Once we entered, I purchased two Freeze Frames at a cost of $6.25 a piece. As you know, Freeze Frames are very similar to the more popular Slurpee and Icee brands.

While the price was exorbitant, I figured the icy relief of a Freeze Frame would make our movie going experience more comfortable. But we were both flummoxed by the lack of Freeze Frame specific straws at the condiment rack. Both Slurpee and Icee provide a straw with a shovel-tip feature in order to access those parts of the drink too frozen to travel the full length of the straw.

Drinking a Freeze Frame from a traditional straw is akin to eating sushi with one chopstick or a salad with a spoon. While we were able to access some of the icy cold relief, approximately 15% of each drink was non-consumable.

I’m confident legions of Freeze Frame drinkers the nation over have struggled similarly. I’ve taken the time to write this letter in hopes you might redeem our experience and work towards preventing future Freeze Frame travesties from happening.

P.S. Our disappointment in the Freeze Frame was rivaled only by our disappointment in the movie.

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Regal Entertainment Responds:

Hi, Mr. Aguilar. Thanks for your concern about no shovel straws for the Freeze Frame drinks. Our food service dept. gives us an order form to use. Our order form does not have the shovel straws, so I cannot order them. I have passed your request on to our food service dept.

Sincerely,
XXX

Big Brown Dad Responds:

Thank you for your note. I appreciate the time it takes to write a letter. As you might have noticed, my letter took some time to write and it took almost 4 months to get a response letter from Regal. Thanks, again.

I have a couple of questions I was hoping you can answer:

1) Do all Regal Cinemas have the same order form? Will the change in the order from take place at a corporate/national level or just locally?

2) On what date will this change be made by?

3) Can you send over two free movie tickets and a voucher for two Freeze Frames with shovel straws?

Regal Entertainment Responds Again and Again

Our Food Service Dept at our corporate offices in Tennessee, create our order form that we use. It is an online system we use. Most Regal Entertainment theatres have the same order form for the managers to use, but one is created foreach theatre individually. It is up to the food service dept. at our corporate office as to what is on the order form. The Manager cannot order anything that is not on the form. I have not heard back yet from our food service dept. as to if they will decide to put the straws on our order form. I will let you know what they say when I hear from them. I do not have vouchers I can hand out for freeze frame drinks, but if you are ever at my theatre here in Ontario again, just ask for me, and I will be happy to give you two Freeze Frame drinks.

Sincerely,

XXX

Hi, Mr. Aguilar. I just heard back from our food service dept. They told me we cannot order those spoon straws for our Freeze Frame drinks. We normally do not give refills on our Freeze frame drinks, but the next time you are at my theatre, I will be happy to give you a free refill on your Freeze Frame drink.

Sincerely,

XXX

Big Brown Dad Responds:

Thanks again for the speedy reply. Did they give you a reason as to why they wouldn’t provide spoon straws? Who can I contact at corporate regarding this matter?

And thanks again for your offer on a free refill but I am bit confused now. Initially you offered me free freeze frames and now a free refill. I’m confused, please help.

Regal Entertainment Responds:

Hi. Mr. Aguilar. I am still willing to give you two free Freeze Frame drinks on me, but I also offered the free refill, because I can only do the two free drinks one time. I offered the free refill, for if you come to my theatre on a different occasion. As far as who you could talk to, you could e-mail Teresa Welsh in our customer service department, and she would help you out.

Big Brown Dad Responds:

Cheers. The GM at Edwards Mountain Village has been very helpful in answering questions regarding the lack of shovel straws for your Freeze Frames. He notified me that the reason his location lacked shovel straws was because the standard supply order form does not list them as an item available for (re)order. He checked with corporate to see if they might add it as an item on the purchase order form. Corporate said, ‘no.’ Your GM could not provide the reasoning behind Corporate’s decision. This is why I’m writing to you.

Can you provide me a reason for failing to provide this convenience?

Thanks again for your assistance in this matter

 

This exchange took place nearly 5 years ago and I’ve never received a response.  I believe I’m due a free refill or a free drink, hard to tell but I will follow up this week to see if the pressure I applied was enough bring Goliath to his knees. I will post their response in Pt. 2.

TWIMC: Spelling Be ?!?! Pt 2 of 2 (Their response)

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Little known fact: during the renaissance they used Jujubes to extract loose teeth.

 

Click to read the letter that prompted Farley’s and Sathers to reply.

Their response:

The following is a copy of the letter you will receive in the mail, along with a replacement coupon. Please allow 4-5 days for processing and delivery.

Thank you also for the product suggestion, although, the spelling of Jujubes is almost as nostalgic as the flavors and texture so a change in the name is highly unlikely. But I will certainly pass your comments along to our Marketing Department as they are always glad to hear from our consumers.

Thank you for writing Farley’s & Sathers Candy Company, Inc. regarding Heide® Jujubes®. Hearing from our consumers better enables us to continue to provide quality products and services. Consumer feedback is very important to us, and we appreciate the opportunity to respond.

Your experience concerns us, since we work hard to produce top quality confections. We carefully monitor the production of our products throughout the entire process. Our goal is to ensure that each and every batch of confections meets our high standards for quality and consistency.

The information you provided will be helpful in our efforts to continually improve our products. I sincerely apologize for any concern or inconvenience this incident may have caused. I assure you, your comments will be brought to the attention of our Quality Assurance Management.

Thank you for taking the time to contact us with your comments. We hope our products will be completely satisfactory in the future.

Sincerely,

XXXX

While I wasn’t successful on this campaign, I will have you note that in 1997 I played a central role in having Laffy Taffy change the color of ink their jokes were written in bc they were illegible most of the time.  So, take that.

 

BBD

 

Sorry, Mother.

RecycleorDie_626

Warning: This post is not intended for the faint of heart.

I have to confess, I’ve been a terrible son. Although I love Mother Earth, I’ve done her wrong for too many years.

I’m Mexican-American, so you know my recycling-for-cash game is on lock.  I bought my first video game on the strength of redeemed soda and beer cans.  For 10-year-olds, few things scream ‘MONEY’ like the sound of an aluminum can getting crushed underfoot.

I wasn’t the only kid in my neighborhood to get hyped off recycling. I remember rumor prompting more than a few kids in Jr High to start collecting soda can tabs, as they were supposed to hold some added redemptive value.  Turns out that shit was Fugazi Fugaziano.

The late 80’s and early 90’s, though,  ushered in a new era of environmental consciousness and soon our municipal trash services began providing recycling specific trash bins.  Today, we have separate bins for green waste (a green can) and recyclables (a blue can).  The problem for me, and I suspect for YOU, is the recycling bin is seldom used.  All my redeemable recyclables (ie, plastic, aluminum and glass) have been diverted into an altogether different $ bin, often leaving the blue bin empty on trash day.  I’m sorry but I  love Mother Earth and can’t continue this way.

So, yesterday, I decided to take a 24 HOUR TOTAL RECYCLE CHALLENGE.  I’d place all the recyclable trash I’d normally throw in the general trash bin and toss it in the big blue bin instead.  How much trash would that amount to? You’re about to find out!

Now, it’s your turn.  How long will you continue to slap your Mother in the face with your unbridled waste? Take the 24 Hour Total Recycle Challenge and post pictures here!  Your Mother will love you for this.

Sincerely,

Big Brown Dad